Right now you’re lost and unsure of what the world expects of you. Up until now, you’ve done everything according to plan: Go to college, graduate on time with an above-average GPA, get a job(any job to support yourself and avoid moving back home), pay the rent on time and live life. But it’s the “live life” part that you’re struggling with. You have your own place, friends and enough money to enjoy higher quality beer than college $2 pitcher nights and a few good dinners out. But you’re asking “is this it?” Is this what I spent 23 years aiming towards?
And yes, dear friend, it will get a little worse before it gets better. Friends will pair off, get married, have kids and ditch you in favor of play dates over wine-infused lunches. You’ll still be doing much of the same thing: working Monday-Friday at a respectable, yet boring desk job that has no relevance to your degree or world interests and spending Saturday nights overindulging in cocktails that lead to all day Sunday’s in bed.
The vast array of eligible men will dry up and dating will become an urban myth. They’ll be a few select boys who float in and out, and you’ll secretly hope that one of them will be the mysterious “one,” but they’ll frustrate you with their lack of substance and maturity. You’ll try hard to make it work and overcome the glaring incompatability between the two of you, but it exhausts you and you’ll wonder what’s wrong with you.
Nothing’s wrong with you Amy, it’s just not your time. You are not traditional and neither will your life be. Instead, your life will be unconventional, adventorous, and scary all at the same time. You will take chances that others fear, live in places you can’t find on a map, meet people from all parts of the country and world, see history unfold in front of your eyes, and travel through 14 timezones alone to see The Great Wall of China. You will ride a camel through the deserts of Egypt and sip wine at a cafe in Tuscany.
You will not wait for a man to complete you or your life, but instead you’ll rely on your inner-strength and willigness to keep going on. Your passion to live life, to see the world and experience different cultures will fuel your drive to survive alone in a world made for two. This is what completes you.
You’ll realize that though marriage and children have eluded you, it’s not everything and it’s not what defines you. Only you, defines you.
So take it easy on yourself and chin up. You have more strength, perseverance, and curiosity for life than you give yourself credit. Sometimes you may feel your life may lack drama, excitement and companionship, but to many, your life is a dream waiting to be fulfilled.