Amy’s Adventures

Typically, July’s my favorite month of the year. Something about heat, humidity and it being too hot to do anything productive makes me happy. Yet this year, I’ve been in funk that I can’t seem to shake. There’s been a lot in my head and a lot going on, but nothing going anywhere. One day it’s this and the next day it’s that. I just can’t focus or make any decisions. Inside, I feel I need answers to move forward with something, but I don’t know what that something is.

Today, however, as I pounded the treadmill, the answer came through the shuffle on my ipod: “Let it Be.” See it seems I’ve been beating myself up when all I needed to do was to “let it be.” Now, I’m not a Beatles fan, and the version I do have is from Brooke White (AI),however, I must  give credit to the “words of wisdom” from the four British amigos.  So for the moment, I’ve resolved to let it be.

“LET IT BE”

When I find myself in times of trouble, mother Mary comes to me,
speaking words of wisdom, let it be.
And in my hour of darkness she is standing right in front of me,
speaking words of wisdom, let it be.

Let it be, let it be, let it be, let it be.
Whisper words of wisdom, let it be.

And when the broken hearted people living in the world agree,
there will be an answer, let it be.
For though they may be parted there is still a chance that they will see,
there will be an answer. let it be.

Let it be, let it be, …..

And when the night is cloudy, there is still a light, that shines on me,
shine until tomorrow, let it be.
I wake up to the sound of music, mother Mary comes to me,
speaking words of wisdom, let it be.

Let it be, let it be, …..

No matter if you’re waist-high in debt, your house is upside down or you hate your job, but stay out of fear you won’t find another one that offers you four weeks of vacation, the economy sucks.

I’m just hanging on. I haven’t made it big with my blog ramblings and though I still have my book to write, which will probably lead to a liable suit from my ex-boyfriend in which all profits I do make will go to my legal team; I’m not banking on that to bail me out of recession Hell, just jail!

I’m one of the underemployed and work diligently to pick up projects here there and everywhere. Yes, I even sometimes refer to myself as the “job whore” and I often wonder how low I will go to maintain my modest inside the beltway lifestyle. It got me thinking about all the jobs I had from high school to graduate school. Could I go back?

My strategy early on in my career was “I can always do this, whatever “this” was to survive.” Yet, today, I look back and wonder could I:

• Wait tables. Answer: No. Seriously, waiting tables is a gift.  People that can balance 10 glasses of tea on a small round tray while smiling and taking the tables food order without ever writing anything down is a talent that would win them Miss America. This is not me.
• Bank Teller. Answer: No. Despite the fact that I could NEVER balance my drawer, today,  this job is all about selling bank services. Have I ever mentioned how much I hate to sell? Selling and math, this is a deadly combination for my career.
• Retail. Answer: Maybe, but leaning no. My stint at World Bazaar in college was a successful one. I learned to make kick-ass red velvet Christmas bows for which I’m still called upon to do every now and again. Unfortunately, today’s retail is more about persuading customers to apply for a credit card they don’t need to get 10% off clothes they can’t afford to buy anyway. I just can’t be a part of the American debt cycle. Although the discount is very tempting.
• HR. Answer: Maybe.  A very successful career tract for nearly 8 years. HR is also a talent or for some a calling. I fell into it and managed to become pretty good at it. I learned a lot about people, organizational politics and legal loopholes. I wouldn’t trade the experience for anything, and I often rely on my HR experience to help me in other aspects of life. Being in HR you develop a thick skin and see the dark side of people and organizations, but could I go back? Maybe. It’s exhausting and thankless work that wore me down.  It’s a case-by-case basis.

So it looks like I’ll keep moving ahead, looking for new challenges and new projects that bring out something new in me.  It seems that if I go back, I’d be doing just that, “going back.” And well, that’s not me.

Finally, the Oscars are here!  And yes, I must admit that instead of listening to today’s homily, I drifted to think about my favorite movies and the lines in them that “spoke” to me. Here’s my top 10:

10. Mommie Dearest - “No wire hangers.”

9. A Few Good Men - “He eats breakfast three hundred yards away from four thousand Cubans who are trained to kill him and no one’s going to tell him how to run his unit, least of all the Harvard mouth in his faggoty white uniform.”

8. Bridget Jones’s Diary - “The only thing worse than smug married couple; lots of smug married couples.”

7. When Harry Met Sally - “All I’m saying is that somewhere out there is the man you are supposed to marry. And if you don’t get him first, somebody else will, and you’ll have to spend the rest of your life knowing that somebody else is married to your husband.”

5. A Beautiful Mind - “Classes will dull your mind, destroy the potential for authentic creativity.”

4. Breakfast at Tiffany’s - “  You could always tell what kind of a person a man thinks you are by the earrings he gives you. I must say, the mind reels.”

3. Gone With the Wind - “No, I don’t think I will kiss you, although you need kissing, badly. That’s what’s wrong with you. You should be kissed and often, and by someone who knows how. ”

2. Dr. Zhivago - “Tonya! Can you play the balalaika?  Can she play? She’s an artist! Who taught you? Nobody taught her! Ah…then it’s a gift.”

1. The Sound of Music - “Where the Lord closes a door, somewhere he opens a window.”

I didn’t  realize I’d miss the winter Olympics so much. Not so much that I love winter sports, but because watching world-class athletes fall on their ass is more entertaining than what’s typically offered on Monday nights. Namely, The Bachelor.

I hate this show and only watch so I can bitch about it and yell at the TV, “you’re sooooo stupid!.”

Yes, I”m cynical and I don’t believe in overnight, I want to live with you forever kind of love. It just doesn’t happen that way. What irritates me more is ABC’s obligatory request for future Bachelor/Bachelorette submissions. During each episode they advertise, “if you’d like to be the next Bachelor send us your submission.” This must be some kind of legal requirement because it seems each time a new Bachelor or Bachelorette is announced their just recycled old contestants.

Case in point:
Jake, Bachelor #14,  dumped by Jillian in Bachelorette  #5

Jason, Bachelor #13 dumped by Deanna in Bachelorette, #4

Trista, Bachelorette #1,  dumped by 1st bachelor, Alex

Meredith, Bachelorette,#3, dumped by Bob

Jen, Bachelorette #3, dumped by Firestone dude

Deanna, Bachelorette #4,  dumped by Brad

Jillian, Bachelorette #5, dumped by dad, Jason

Please ABC, I beg you cancel this show!!!

Lately, I’ve caught myself saying, “remember when.”  This phrase is frightening , yet unavoidable. So instead of  fighting it I will embrace it.

Remember when:

• You could get a deal on ebay
• E-cards were free
• You talked on the phone instead of Facebook or Twitter
• You could remember telephone numbers because they weren’t listed in your cell phone
• You went to the Dr. instead of self-diagnosing via WebMD or by watching Dr. Oz and Dr. Phil
• There was only 1 remote control (This may only be me b/c I can’t figure out how to combine all 4)
• Starbucks was for drinking coffee, not an office
• Photography was art and not a mantel of candids
• Stores closed on Sunday or opened at 1PM
• You paid cash for groceries and gas

When have you said, remember when?