A Letter to My Younger Self

Amy, Right now you’re lost and unsure of what the world expects of you. Up until now, you’ve done everything according to plan:  Go to college, graduate on time with an above-average GPA, get a job(any job to support yourself and avoid moving back home), pay the rent on time and live life. But it’s the “live life” part that you’re struggling with. You have your own place, friends and enough money to enjoy higher quality beer than college $2 pitcher nights and a few good dinners out. But you’re asking “is this it?” Is this what I spent 23 years aiming towards? And yes, dear friend, it will get a little worse before it gets better. Friends will pair off, get married, have kids and ditch you in favor of play...

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My Risk Journey

I’m continuing on my quest to understand risk, and specifically risk when it comes to dating and relationships. I have no problem risking my life flying 14 hours on Egypt Air or Air China (if you flew these airlines you’d understand the risk),  but when it comes to personal, one-on-one, I think I might like you kind of risk, I fade into obscurity and the shy 4 year-old girl that was too scared to walk alone down the aisle as a flower girl in my uncle’s wedding comes out. I choose to hide behind fear. Right now, I have no answers, I’m just exploring. But I found the following quote helpful in my journey: “To love is to risk not being loved in return. To hope is to risk pain. To try is to risk failure, but risk must be taken because the...

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Risk, Love, Rejection & Vampires

I’ve been thinking a lot about  risk, love and rejection.  After all, there may be a reason that I’m still single:  I’m terrified to “put myself out there.” I never really knew what “putting yourself out there”  meant, however, recently I’ve decided to define it as:  finding someone you like or could like and telling them, or better yet, showing them your true feelings and interest. Simply, I suck at this. Instead, I retreat, appear aloof and pray that he’ll figure it out on his own that I do like them. All this, so I can avoid rejection.  With age;  however, I realize that the fear of rejection may render you alone with an ageing cat and a TiVo remote. Yes, folks I’m pointing the finger at me....

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